14 January (part 2)
Sean is pissing me off. I’ve talked about this before. The latest is he sent out a group invitation to his birthday. On it is this guy – a friend of his – I slept with years ago. Let’s just say, he left a traumatic souvenir behind, not forgetting didn’t want to know after he’d got what he wanted. Aside from his 30th, Sean has never invited me out to his birthday. I think that’s rude in itself. I would prioritise him over someone in my group who had treated him like shit. We don’t speak about it. But this one is the last straw.
He sent a message earlier in the week referencing the group invitation. He called it a ‘stupendous gaff’ and that he had ‘uninvited the person’. That makes me seem like a loser whatever way you look at it. Did I ask him to uninvite him? Am I still bitter? Am I hung up about it this many years later? What if he doesn’t realise he is uninvited and turns up? I told him I couldn’t make it and wasn’t comfortable him uninviting people. How could Sean even make a mistake like that?
He’s just called. I’m watching The Big Fat Diet Programme. And I don’t want to talk to him. So I don’t pick up. He leaves a message. Something about how he hopes I’m not ‘hurt’. All a bit American if you ask me. Then. Then he follows with a text.
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‘When I grow up I’m going to marry a prince, Granny.’
Fast forward 27 years. I’m a hot, successful, kind and affectionate, officially ‘grown up’ girl-about-town. Still in search of The One. It’s New Year’s Eve and I’m in bed. Alone. Tanked up on Valium.
The quest has been active now for the best part of 20 years. I know he’s out there. I just need to find out where and how to find him. Things have got to change.
This is going to be my year. I just know it. So I have decided to document my experiences to amuse more than anything else. In so doing, the creative process may provide some kind of personal enlightenment and help face my demons too. And who knows. The journey may lead me to my prince. And where the chronicles begin.
